The Long Pause

So - it's been longer than i've wanted it to be (not that TOO many people are on the edge of their seats waiting for me to update), but i was busy traveling across 6 states last week with 15 college age students in tow.

Yah - i'm sure you are like - mmmm, kidnapper? But no, trust me. Quite the opposite. I work at a university and our office coordinates an alternative spring break option for students who apply to go. So 15 students went on my trip...we went to Biloxi, Mississippi to work with a non-profit group there dedicated to working with the victims of hurricane katrina.

It's been awhile since i've done something i'd classify as "volunteer manual labor" so it was a week that i spent getting my hands dirty, literally. I'm still finding white paint on my arms and legs that just won't come off. We helped a guy who owns a historic house on the gulf coast, but couldn't move back in until some major things were taken care of - namely, the lead paint had to be scraped off and then new primer and paint had to go on. So our group worked with him for 3 of the 4 work days we had. Although scraping paint, applying layers of primer and then paint don't sound super glamorous - it was strange how i didnt' feel like i was really working all week.

Yet at the end of the day i was exhausted and dirty, ready for bed way before any of the students and often the first to rise even though i'm not a morning person at all. I was nervous when i volunteered to help lead this trip, i thought maybe that part of my heart had closed a bit. Honestly, i think that's why i forced myself to volunteer in the first place. It was outside my comfort zone - as my version of helping people is usually from my office or working one on one with someone. So i think it was sort of a challenge to myself to see if i had it within myself to really enjoy straight up volunteering again.

I guess as i type this i think i'm probably coming off as a really cruel, mean person. And i promise, I'm not - i just ahve a hard time pushing myself out of my comfort zone when it comes to volunteering. Things run through my mind like:
"What if i have to talk to someone who i can't understand very well?"
"What if i am responsible for a project i don't have the ability to complete?"

Things like that.

But here's the good news....

I went, participated, lead, followed, laughed, slept, stayed up, attempted eating peas (didn't work out), was forced into eating pork (ugh) and mcdonalds multiple times. So it was a mostly good mix. In returning to work this week - i feel like i accomplished something really solid last week. Not just for myself, but i feel like i accomplished something by working well with a group of people, many of them totally new, and actually made a difference for someone outside of where my typical comfort zone would have taken me.

I remember now that when you are really putting yourself out there - volunteering your services and never really knowing where it will take you - you always end up getting more out of it than you could ever put in.