Catch 22

I was more rock and roll at 16 than I am now, we all were
The screeching guitars, crashing symbols and amplified vocals
Sent thrills through me then and we would

Turn it up times ten in my little gold Tercel that lost its’ rims
to bumps in the road on a regular basis,
Leaving me to pull over and scurry into medians after them, hoping
no one would recognize me on the way to

Wednesday night Youth Group – we would pack out
that upstairs room; where our own rock stars would perform on
the stage we built for them; playing to our hearts content
Hundreds of jumping feet, singing along and

I can remember every beat of those songs, each break in the music
building suspense and we were so cool to know the next word
This was our rock and roll; our version of blue streaked hair and cigarettes it

Kept us safe from what happens next
Where we go our own ways and pretend it will always be the same
between us, but knowing deep down – these were fleeting moments that are
Now memories that rush back to me at 20, 25 and now at 29,
Flashes of what we wanted to be and how we desperately wanted to just stay on
those couches, listening to the strumming of the guitar and harmonized voices
singing songs that still play in my head on a rainy day where

The splatter of rain on my window, the tears that may have spilled; remind me
of who we were in those safe moments, where we needed each other most
and what we’ll never be again

aam 2010